No, Sparky!

Lady Gaga Fugue

2011-06-21T13:52:00.000-07:00

2011-05-16T07:20:00.000-07:00

Витас - Опера 2

2011-05-15T12:22:00.000-07:00

2011-05-14T13:10:00.001-07:00

I wanna start updating this again, for posterity.

Picked up some records over the last week, so here's what I've been really diggin on:

Paul & Linda McCartney - Ram
Joni Mitchell - Hejira
Tiny Tim - God Bless Tiny Tim
Laurie Anderson - Big Science
Captain Beefheart & His Magic Band - Trout Mask Replica
Keith Jarrett - The Koln Concert
Nappy Roots - Good Day (12" single w/ instrumental!)
Toto - IV

the people at the record store must think I'm so weird.

also been really loving the following whilst in the car, a mix of my old and soon-to-be favorites:

Pere Ubu - The Modern Dance
Television - s/t
David Bowie - Aladdin Sane
tUnE-yArDs - W H O K I L L
Dirty Projectors - Rise Above

alright, I'm off to go hand people their food back.

this actually happened

2010-05-27T02:00:00.000-07:00

i was driving around with three passengers. at a red light, another car pulls up. the passenger rolls down his window and motions for my rear passengers to do the same.

he asks: "dudes, you wanna go 420 with us?"

my passenger replies: "no, we're good, thanks."

the first retorts, "oh, come on, you've got frickin' jesus driving!"

apparently i'm frickin' jesus.

but now it's a good time for my musics

2010-05-11T17:48:00.000-07:00

Lean by Apostrophe S

it's good times for other people's musics

2010-05-05T18:28:00.001-07:00

yes yes yes, people gotta listen

2010-05-03T19:52:00.000-07:00

download this ish

special thanks to MC Microsoft Anna for droppin a hot slice of rhyme on this platter

play it:

Greenlight Traffic by Apostrophe S

2010-04-27T18:16:00.000-07:00

more music from the purveyor of punctuation

2010-04-13T17:27:00.000-07:00

yo yo yo hit this

How small by Apostrophe S

it's the new 's joint!

disclaimer: contains altered samples of the following

Proverb (Nobukazu Takemura Remix) - Steve Reich
I Sit On the Ridge at Dusk - Dirty Projectors

Soundcloud?

2010-04-07T18:40:00.001-07:00

I have no idea what soundcloud is but I just got an account on there for the Apostrophe S musics, and that enables me to embed my music directly in the blog! also, you can follow the link to my page and download mp3 versions of the tracks. cool digz.

Something's Off by Apostrophe S

(wait, is this another new song?)

Intermetro by Apostrophe S

NEW SONG

2010-04-07T14:38:00.001-07:00

Whats kickin chicken licken?
There's a new song up on the myspace
called "Something's Off"!!!
(and it's not in horrible quality either)
GO GET AT IT!

there's no explaining exactly what meter this song is in, that's why it sounds like something's off

DO IT UP
DOWNLOAD IT

APOSTROPHE S

2010-03-29T20:24:00.000-07:00

Well I've been teasing you ... now here is some real music from my Apostrophe S project. The track is called "Anabatic Blues."

enjoy it here (myspace, low quality, but other songs too!)
download it here (HQ)

Also: here's what I've been digging lately (mostly that LOUD SHIT)

Keiichi Suziki - Mother 2 Soundtrack
Dr. Dog - Fate
Raymond Scott -Manhattan Research Project, Inc.
Joanna Newsom - Have One On Me
Justice - Cross
Crookers -Tons of Friends
Joker (all day every day)
Javelin - Jamz n Jemz
Major Lazer
Mr. Oizo

also, hopefully I'll be going to see Micachu, FlyLo, Nosaj Thing, and (Dr.) Kode9 at (le) poisson rouge tomorrow night!! Can't wait to hear that system also can't wait for Comsmogramma to drop somebody get me a leak!

Everyone highfiving everyone

2010-03-07T21:53:00.000-08:00

in the immortal words of jeph jacques:

Fang Island- Fang Island: Imagine if Dan Deacon and the Hold Steady teamed up to write a self-help rock album. It would probably sound a lot like this. Easily one of the best records of 2010 so far.

Where the Mild Wings Are

2010-02-15T21:52:00.000-08:00

Here you go, Sparky.

Apostrophe S

2010-02-15T17:27:00.001-08:00

Announcing my new beat project under the name Apostrophe S.

http://www.myspace.com/apostrophesbeats

updates coming soon.

song downloads coming soon to this blog.

what do you guys think of this?:

I think I'll change the cover, but I like the name.

peace

Lately

2010-02-06T22:56:00.001-08:00

feeling noughty

2010-01-01T23:41:00.000-08:00

resolutions for the decade, perhaps:

teach

ocarina

violin

guitar

sparky's year in music

2009-12-12T13:50:00.001-08:00

ooooooooooooooooooo vibrations!

one of my favorite jams of the year. bring us more, oh golden panda!

pure sugar-coated magic.

heavier than Slayer.

pretty much what I wish everything sounded like.

the way all electronic duos who play tables covered in knobs and switches should sound.

boo-yah.

pop music ... FROM THE FUTURE!

so if Vampire Weekend and Dr. Dog had a baby, and then Fleet Foxes and Grizzly Bear had another baby, and then those two babies fucked ... that baby still wouldn't metaphorically represent how good this band is.

if you know, then you know. if you don't know, then you should.

the best way to keep your "R n' B" album from sucking is to not sing on it. the best way to make it awesome is to be Ghostface Killah.

what would I want? Sky / what would I want? Sky / what would I want? Sky / What would I want? Sky / What would I want? Sky / What would I want? Sky / What would I want? Sky / What would I want? Sky has been stuck in my head for like weeks straight, I can't get it to leave. Song makes me wanna put on "I Am the Walrus" outfits and make absurd experimental films in the forest or some such hippie bullshit. Superb.

thumpin'.

Not since CocoRosie's first album have I been so charmed by something with such poor recording quality. Certainly the best hip-hop/R'n'B/indie/avant-garde female solo act out there today.

And album you can really devote yourself to for innumerable listens. Endlessly revealing.

so spacey and weird I swear it's from an alternate reality.

gravy.

please take "joy fantastic" out of this album permanently. otherwise awesome.

groovy as hell.

yes.

"said my name is drizzy / there ain't nobody realer / cup inside a cup smokin' ghostface killahs"

I'm so ready for this band to blow the fuck up.

it's hard being this cool to me, isn't it Mr. Braxton?

not nearly enough love in the world for this record.

what just happened to my ears?

forget about the album, the light show they had on tour this year was better than most other albums from this year put together. so you can guess how good the music must be.

just the most epic album from the best band in the world don't worry about it. (just wish they'd go back to horrible computer drums, sort of.)

who knew fly beats and neo-Cambridge scene folk could go together so seamlessly?

what the fuck this album is so good everyone needs it.

the lastest from the current kings of art-pop. they're the new talking heads, whatever, I went there.

new zealand's finest fuzzy fun-time prog-pop band.

ladies and gentlemen

2009-11-19T20:01:00.001-08:00

it is with great sadness that i must announce to you that batman has left us for a better place.

may he rest in a swanky apartment much larger than mine.

a double dose of dopeness from dr. evil

2009-10-28T08:33:00.000-07:00

just reminding you how great this shit is.

Stalin vs. Martians

2009-10-24T14:36:00.000-07:00

This is Jeopardy! ... and This is Angoon.

2009-10-21T09:23:00.000-07:00

just lean it against iraq or something.

2009-09-09T16:55:00.000-07:00

Gama Bomb - Citizen Brain

2009-07-12T15:00:00.000-07:00

This album is from last year. I realize that's an idiotic way to start an album review, but after I typed it out I found myself with nothing better to start with and denied my urge to delete it and start over. What's more interesting than the fact that this album was released in 2008 is that it is one of the best examples of the New Thrash genre (please, I hope I never see that spelled "nu-thrash") that includes bands like Skeletonwitch and Warbringer. Gama Bomb peddles a break-neck, in-your-face style of old-skool thrash (imagine a tasty brew of Slayer, Iron Maiden, and Megadeth ... then imagine drinking said brew from the skull of one of your enemies) tempered with fun, down-home lyrics about playing 32-bit vidja games and being buried alive by zombies. I'm tempted to call it nerd-thrash, but you know how I hate inventing genres. In all seriousness though, this is the metal band all those greasy computer nerds from high school wish they were in (unless they were the greasy computer nerds with long black hair who listened to Opeth, in which case I would have to say Opeth is probably the band they would wish they were in). The band tends to stick to songs with compact forms yet highly intricate structures, and the result of listening to one of their songs at full volume is a lot like being hit in the face with enormous Bucky Balls. (Sounds unpleasant, I know. But nerds love being hit in the face with Bucky Balls.) Regardless, the band's adherence to expert technical playing doesn't digress into needless wankery, and their sense of fun and humor doesn't take away from the impressive girth of the music itself. Even if their singer tends towards the laughable side of Dave Mustaine (if Dave Mustaine was occasionally full-force gripped by the balls by a jilted sorceress Gypsy (who is also a zombie) for no apparent reason), we are immediately distracted by the virtuosic guitar shredding and immaculate drumming of the band's instrumentalists. The band is also very much in touch with the punk influence behind thrash metal, and their speed and force are backed by gang vocals and politically-minded micro-songs about hating cops and global warming. Though it's never clear whether the band considers to be the greater threat to humanity between imminent global catastrophe via global warming or imminent global catastrophe via zombie apocalypse, they'll probably tell you, when the dust settles, that the government was behind it all. The main agenda for this group, however, is fun. Loud, fast, and hard. That's how I like my metal. Also zombies.

Try it here.

not quite, sparky

2009-07-08T20:50:00.001-07:00

not quite

so this is the new best song of all time

2009-07-07T19:52:00.000-07:00

someone's killing celebrities, i thought you should know

2009-06-28T11:48:00.000-07:00

gotta do my shoutouts now.
peace to:

david carradine

farrah fawcett

michael jackson

billy mays

my name is mister cappy-tan
this is the producer, sparky

GOODNIGHT SWEET PRINCE

2009-06-25T15:50:00.000-07:00

I WILL FONDLY MISS YOU, OH KING OF POP!

IWRESTLEDABEARONCE - It's All Happening

2009-06-23T13:52:00.000-07:00

My current candidate for album art of the year:

I don't think I could think of a more appropriate name for this release. Genre-hopping, Ritalin-addicted heavy fucking metal that sounds alternately like a less serious Between the Buried and Me and a far more clever Between the Buried and Me. The songs are short, brutal, and unique. Shades of HORSE the Band and Meshuggah... but also pop-song interludes, bluegrass breakdowns, and animal sounds mixed in for god knows what reason: let me warn you, if this sort of irony pisses you off, then this album will piss you off more than anything else. But if you can appreciate the band's sense of humor alongside their seriously heavy "chuggachuggachuggachugga RAAAAWRRRRRRRRRRRR hnggggggggggg-----untz untz untz untz untz untz untz ::::: bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzst" type stuff, then you might just come away from this album with a whole new point of view. And, to boot, it's just great for throwing on at full volume and getting all your frustrations out with. Highly recommended.

Try it here.

So Many Dymanos - The Loud Wars

2009-06-12T18:37:00.001-07:00

So like a million bajillion years ago the song "Heat/Humidity" by these guys snuck onto my iPod somehow. Keep in mind, a million bajillion years ago, there was a lot less music piracy, and I was unfamiliar with torrenting and blogsearch.google.com, so the most likely way this thing crept into my collection was via download from their MySpace page. Remember those days? Me too. I was getting really into the Blood Brothers and Cursive and generally was on the prowl for crazy-sounding emo. So Many Dynamos filled that gap pretty well, at least as far as that one song went, and they won some bonus points having a palindrome for a name. I specifically remember listening to "Heat/Humidity" about a dozen times on one skiing trip. FAST FORWARD TO LAST NIGHT:So a few nights before last, a friend of mine invited me to go see Maps & Atlases. I was like "Whatever, no one good plays around here, but they sound pretty bad ass." Therefore, as per my new can-do attitude, I agreed to go simply based on nothing. Me and a few friends met up at my other friend's apartment before the show. The friend who invited me proceeded to show me a video of Maps & Atlases' "Everyplace Is A House" being played behind footage of Beeker from the Muppets freaking out (you know, the one where he's got steam coming out of his ears and shit?). Well that video pretty much summed up my evening. We did some stuff and then walked back to the venue through the rain. We got there, I had to pay for my friend, and there was no re-entry. Welcome to my hometown. Anyway we got there as this band called Fang Island were playing - and let me say something about them: they are loud as FUCK. After they were done rocking the fuck out, I was all like "Hey, who's gonna play next?" and my friend goes, "I dunno, some band called 'So Many Dynamos.'" And that's when shit got real. I was all jumping up and down and freaking out: "Oh man! They're fucking awesome!" and started getting generally amped. And then they played. And then Maps & Atlases played. And it was good.

But this post isn't about some dumb show I went to (probably the last dumb show I'll be to all summer). It's about So Many Dynamo's new album, "The Loud Wars." I bought a copy at the show because I was totally hood rich and messed up, and thank God I bought this particular CD because I had already torrented their previous two albums (a fact that I had forgotten in between some royal ass-pains involving getting my laptop fixed). So I ripped it into my computer and left it there and tried to listen to some other stuff, namely the most recent Maps & Atlases EP that I also purchased at the show. But I started leafing through the booklet for "The Loud Wars," and these dudes have footnotes to their lyrics. FUCKING FOOTNOTES*. As if they couldn't hammer the nerd thing home any harder - but it's whatever because they're so cute. Anyway, what I'm trying to get at is that this record is hard NOT to listen to once you have it. From the first off-kilter bars of "Artifacts of Sound" through the dance party riffage of "Oh, the Devastation!" and on into the end of "The Formula," the thing sounds like if armies enjoyed drinking PBR and dancing to math rock rather than killing each other. Like, if there was an army of people wearing glasses and plaid button-up shirts with the sleeves rolled up, and then that army met up with a bunch of stoned Yale students; like, if we were at Bonaroo right now instead of wherever we are. ("We don't make friends/we build armies").

Part of the reason this album sounds so freakin good is definitely due to the production work of the one and only Chris Walla, guitarist with Death Cab 4 Cutie and indie-uber-producer, whose previous work with the Thermals (specifically on "Fuckin A," the best album ever [sometimes] and official home of my theme song, "How We Know") I admired very much. Walla applies his patented "taking a weird scrappy band and turning them into U2" formula to the Dynamos' sound without losing that sense that they could play your basement party tomorrow. There's also a few bells and noises that I assume he had something to do with (there's a footnote about it but I'm too lazy to look it up - I guess this proves once and for all who's nerdier: SMD). Overall, the "huge but intimate" sound is really what makes the record: there's not too much reverb, but when it's there it creates a warming blanket; there's not too much bass keyboard, but when it's there it's doin' work; there's not too much distortion on the snare, but God that little bit makes such a difference. You see what I mean? Walla took these weirdos, who were guilty on all counts of no-bass-player in the first degree and tinny sounding angular guitars and turned them into a big warming sun on sound - albeit a slightly drunk, too-skinny sun with hair in his face who listens to Nintendocore but doesn't tell anybody. This is a very fun album too, and that's its biggest strength: "seriousing up" the Dynamos didn't destroy their sense of scrappy danceability, and the band was able to retain its "not nerdy, just interesting" vibe. Making them biggest was a good move, Walla. Enjoy your footnote.

*try it. (rapidshare - password: www.mp3tera.org)

Julianna Barwick - Florine

2009-06-12T13:45:00.000-07:00

This album contains some of the most beautiful music I've ever heard. Not much needs to be said beyond that, but I'll wax poetic anyway. If you want to skip over the boring part, just get the album, lay down somewhere in the middle of a field in the sun, and let it take you on a trip.

Julianna Barwick is a leading example of what I consider to be the New Wave of Young American Composers: independent, inspired, and unique voices from various cities in the U.S. who write gorgeous music under the guise of pop or rock. Barwick's music would not only have been considered avant-guarde 40 years ago, but it also would have been incredibly hard to produce. Barwick's compositions and performances are based on layers and layers of her own voice, looped and manipulated with the help of live electronics, spliced and edited over each other to create an intricate tapestry of sound. Barwick claims to take inspiration from the congregation at her childhood church, which did not have any isntruments, who created an ethereal environment of a capella voices. Barwick aims for and often approaches the same kind of transcendence that church composers - from Tallis to Bach to Part - have always grasped at. Her voice warbles, strides, spreads like light through stained glass, blanketing the listener in what is more of an epiphany than a piece of music. Through electronic manipulation, Barwick not only creates a whole choir of airy sopranos but is able to create an entire four-part choir by pitch-shifting her voice lower or higher. However, the truest beauty to be found in a Barwick piece is from listening to non-album cuts, preferably live versions. Here, we can see the piece unfold from a single, swaying vocal line into a fully-fleshed force of nature, building to crescendo, reaching apex, and then dying away into beatitude.

Try it here. Just fucking do it.

Colin Munroe - Is the Unsung Hero

2009-06-11T10:19:00.000-07:00

In keeping with my promise to start reviewing records, I'll start with this little gem of a mixtape from a fellow named Colin Munroe.

I've been partying pretty hard lately, mainly crashing at my friend's apartment and staring at the ceiling while my friends play beer pong for hours on end. Over the past few weeks, there have been few jams coming out of the stereo system that I didn't recognize: songs like Fabolous' "Throw it in the Bag (ft. The-Dream)," Swizz Beat's "When I Step In the Club," MSTRKRFT's "Bounce (ft. N.O.R.E.), Drake's "Still Fly," and especially Sean Kingston's new, indelible pop smash "Replay" have kept me company through many a ceiling-staring session and have helped set the perfect early-summer, haven't-a-care-in-the-world party atmosphere.

But there were a few tracks I didn't recognize: poppier than the electronics-soaked hip-hop around them, with delicacy and intricate arrangements, tight lilting harmonies surrounding the lead vocals - what or who was this? It turned out to be Colin Munroe.
Munroe's music is pretty unique. He creates bouncy, upbeat pop music akin in production sparkle to Maroon 5 or Passion Pit, but his forte is adding in a flavorful twist of hip-hop. His mixtape "Is the Unsung Hero" features spots from some of the best underground rappers of the now, including Mickey Factz, Drake, and Wale. The track that first really got my attention, though, was a re-working (or as Munroe calls it, a REVOX) of Bob Dylan's ballad "Who Killed Davey Moore?" Munroe takes a live version of the track and, as if dusting off an old '78 and transfering it into his computer, makes it shine and sparkle with 21st century intensity. He essentially only adds multiple harmony tracks to the chorus ("Who killed Davey Moore?/Why and what's the reason for?), allowing Dylan's storytelling to shine through with its necessary directness and indignation. But the harmonies that Munroe adds are astounding; they surround and compliment Dylan as if they were spotlights shining down on him from above.

The standout single, "Piano Lessons," is just as captivating. The song uses a pop bounce to tell the story, through pitch-shifted vocals, of a young man forced to take piano lessons against his will. The lessons, though a bore and a task, do of course contribute to the boy's later blossoming interest in music; and we can safely assume that the boy in question is Munroe himself. But the music he makes here would not have come about through any conventional career in classical piano. The track features gorgeous pop-bounce production from Black Milk (sounding something like his track "Without U" from his last mix, "Tronic") and a guest rap from Joell Ortiz (because who else could name drop Mozart and Beethoven in the same line?), but the star here is clearly Munroe's voice. He plays two parts: the storyteller, who shares his natural singing voice, and the young man who is the subject of the song, a persona created through some nifty pitch-shifting. The end result is indistinguishable from either hip-hop or conventional pop, but can also sound a hell of a lot better than popular examples from both genres. The music shows what can be done when creative artists meld genres together to create new experiences for the listener, and this mixtape is perfect for any occasion, beit picnics, parties, barbeques, road trips, or whenever you want to take a break from the radio.

Other standouts include "Will I Stay" (the track featuring Wale), "Cannon Ball" (featuring Drake), and "One More Chance" (featuring Mickey Factz). If this guy could get a spot on the charts, I guarentee that the Jonas Brothers would disappear into obscurity. God, please make this the sound of pop in the future.

The mixtape is available on Munroe's MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/colinmunroe

let's talk about something: record reviews

2009-04-26T22:35:00.000-07:00

I'm gonna start reviewing the music I listen to. Here's a review I wrote about Dan Deacon's newest, "Bromst":

A famous music critic once described Steve Reich's "Music for 18 Musicians" as being like a framed picture of a river that retained all the qualities of motion and change that a real live river would have. "Steve Reich has framed the river!" the reviewer exclaimed. Now Dan Deacon's newest album gets a lot of unfair comparisons to Reich's music, probably because these days anything with mallet percussion in it gets a Reich reference from any critic who supposes themself to be knowledgeable about music (see Pitchfork reviews for this album as well as Why?'s "Alopecia," ctrl+F, "Steve Reich"). If Deacon's music bears any resemblance to minimalism, it shares far more in common with the crowded soundscapes of the Philip Glass ensemble circa "Einstein on the Beach," the technicolor psychedelia of Terry Reilly's early tape pieces, or the shape-shifting harmonic drones of LaMonte Young, whom the Deac-ster recently name-dropped in a magazine interview ("I wonder how the world would have been different if Kurt Cobain had worn a LaMonte Young t-shirt").

But Deacon's new masterpiece "Bromst" has something more important in common with Reich than vibraphones and marimbas: Deacon's music has effectively "framed" the "river" of technology, the constant flow of information through fiberoptic cables and invisible waves in the air. "Bromst" is an unending assault of technological information that sounds like music, a super-saturated day-glo blanket of beeps, boops, whirs, and whizzes. The album envelopes you much like the crowd at a Deacon show does: warm, loving, pulsating, sweaty, and on all sides. In fact, that sounds a lot like sex. Ear sex. With strangers.

Of course the appeal of the hallucinogen-fueled neo-techno pow-wow noon pop-up book of the Dan Deacon Experience is the main draw for many fans. But the power of this album is undeniable. It's as inclusive as any good crowd will ever be. It is the power of hundreds of bodies filtered through a computer and manifested in sound. It's as if the collective electronic power of Twitter or Facebook fuels the wall of sound. The cables coming out of your laptop replace the strings of Deacon's "guitar." Sometimes, cables break, creating distortion or rapid choppy tremolo. Voices try to emerge from the hoopla, crying out desperately, like every blog-post or Tweet, to have their opinion heard over the milieu of voices and noises. But every now and then, the bombast retreats and moments of pure transcendence emerge. Notable examples include the MIDI-powered player piano (another stroke of innovative mechanical-technological hybridization) that codas the tracks "Build Voice" and "Slow with Horns," and, most chillingly, the vocal dog pile phase-piece "Wet Wings."

But no matter how epic and zeitgeist-y this album may prove to be, it will always be initially compared to his previous work, "Spiderman of the Rings." Many try to oppose the two, calling "Bromst" the serious artwork to "Spiderman"'s pure pop pogo stick. But "Bromst" can be just as bizarre and nearly as fun; for instance, the beginning riff of "Woof Woof," a chopped-up bassline accompanied by one of those chippy dog-noises you'd find on a "Learn to Spell" toy made for yearlings (he stole my idea!), is as boppy and jumpy as any moment on "Spiderman." But what "Bromst" lacks is its "Crystal Cat." There's no discernible classic track here. But of course, when your whole album is a classic, it's hard to point to one track that beats them all. There's no potential bonked-out YouTube videos here (though let's pray there shall be), but there is a veritable monument to be seen. This album will endure beyond the hipster thing and become one of our touchstones. Or maybe I'm wrong. But that's what the internet is all about, right?

2009-04-25T11:41:00.000-07:00

things i have written about this year:

1: groupthink, or how the interactions of groups affect individual characters and actions
2: the dynamics of humanity in social interaction, the 'colonization' of minorities
3: bloggers as the fighters of the internet's very own cultural revolution, the future of new media; cory doctorow
4: the internet as a culture, and cultural appropriation; why i hate hipsters
5: the earth in absence of humans; humans in absence of humanity
6: the new media controversy and the clash between 'pirates' and industries

it all seems to have to do with human behavior, now that i think about it.

Things I have written about this year:

2009-04-22T12:46:00.000-07:00

1. A comparative analysis of Batman and medieval Christian mystic John of the Cross
2. The role of love in revolution from the surrealist movement to the 1960s
3. A band I had in elementary school called "The Three Cheeses"
4. Malt Liquor and rap music
5. Girl Talk
6. Kryzstof Penderecki and graphic notation

And that, my friends, is why I am now in the process of tirelessly researching a paper on professional wrestling. The end.

2009-04-04T19:37:00.000-07:00

here's your proverb for today:

don't ask the artist at work

2009-03-14T04:32:00.000-07:00

free wifi in their JFK terminal? i do believe you've made yourself another loyal customer, jetblue.

this post brought to you courtesy of awesome

2009-02-21T15:42:00.000-08:00

they followed us, mal. the gorram reavers followed us.

i love the internet

2009-02-20T13:24:00.000-08:00

milk's favorite soft-rock band

2009-02-14T20:50:00.000-08:00

2009-02-13T14:13:00.000-08:00

OPEN LETTER TO SPIKE LEE

Dear Mr. Lee,

I love your films. I even like the ones that no one has seen, like Mo' Better Blues and Miracle at St. Anna. I know people often accuse you of unfairly focusing on blacks, showing women in misogynist-fantasy situations, and accusing most white people about being racist, but I don't see any of that in your movies, really. I think you do as honest a job at portraying reality as you can, or at least to portraying your reality, which is the closest any of us will probably ever get to objectivity.

But I am not here to discuss social theory or race struggles. I am here to issue you a challenge.

It is a simple proposition: make a movie about white people. In fact, make a movie with no black people in it. No Asians either. Just whites, and maybe Mexicans. No one else. To make it even crazier, make sure half of the whites are Jews. (Inside man doesn't count, of course, despite the large number of whites and Jews, it wasn't really about white people; rather, it was about the audience solving the mystery, and also about confronting new racism, such as in the scene with the Sheik).

Why do I offer this challenge to you, you ask? Because I respect you as a filmmaker, and as an artist. I know that, as an artist, it's always important to challenge yourself and to move forward in creative ways. In this sense, it's important for you to do things that people don't expect out of you. You've already established yourself as one of cinema's greatest directors, and have helped to usher in a prolific, free age of black film making. People, and arguably society, have been changed by your films, challenged to confront themselves and their role in an American society that, by all accounts, has not transcended a long history of racism and discrimination.

Now that we've elected a black president, many say that racism is over, that we live in a post-race society. I would disagree, but I think that it is the first step in achieving an overall cultural ability to shed our history of discrimination. Perhaps the most important place this needs to be reflected in is in the arts. If people can see you, the most prominent, innovative, and outspoken black filmmaker in history, create a movie so out of your vein, so beyond what they expect, simply through your choice to create a story about white people, then the erosion of race will have started for certain. If you stop confronting the problems of racism, if you show that your filmmaking skills do not need to be harnessed to this end any longer, that you have achieved what you set out to achieve, then it will show the nation that we are on our way to a new world of peace and understanding once and for all.

You will probably never read this, or if you do, I assume you won't take my advice very seriously. However, if you'd ever like to sit down and discuss it, I shouldn't be too hard to find (I go to the school you teach at).

Also, I'd just like to compliment you on Malcolm X, your masterpiece, and on When the Levees Broke. Also, your promotion of Terrence Blanchard's masterful music is incredible and totally laudable. I know that, either way, you'll do the right thing.

Peace and love,

Sparky

batman lost his wallet

2009-02-13T14:10:00.000-08:00

why I wish I had been paying closer attention to music in 2007

2009-02-12T08:06:00.000-08:00

these are some of my new favorite albums, and they are all from 2007. How does this happen? Maybe the clues will lead me down the trail of an elusive serial killer.

why do we fall, master batman

2009-02-11T20:53:00.000-08:00

Sparky010: sweet jesus
Sparky010: http://lolthulhu.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/internet-o_rlyeh.jpg
Cap'nSpoon: http://www.fundacion.telefonica.com/at/colfotografia/imagenes/lawler02.jpg
Cap'nSpoon: do you get it
Sparky010: no
Cap'nSpoon: it's an old hat.
Sparky010: oh you are
Sparky010: something else entirely

spitzer is pleased

2009-02-01T17:50:00.001-08:00

sparky's best

2008-12-14T18:04:00.000-08:00

Ladies and gentlemen: Sparky's favorite albums of 2008

Lil' Wayne - Tha Carter III
The Tallest Man On Earth - Shallow Grave
Fleet Foxes - Fleet Foxes
Pattern is Movement - All Together
Girl Talk - Feed the Animals
MGMT - Oracular Spectacular
Conor Oberst - Conor Oberst
Vampire Weekend - Vampire Weekend
Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago
Dr. Dog - Fate
Laura Marling - Alas, I Cannot Swim
Passion Pit - Chunk of Change EP
Atmosphere - If Life Gives You Lemons, You Paint That Shit Gold
The Walkmen - You & Me
Ratatat - LP3

the end.

Also, some movies:

*******The Dark Knight
***In Bruges
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Be Kind Rewind
Burn After Reading
Pineapple Express

there's no towel on the wall anymore

2008-12-13T23:23:00.001-08:00

we've known each other for so long

2008-12-13T15:25:00.000-08:00

ladies and gentlemen, i give you rick rollups.

2008-12-10T23:38:00.000-08:00

2:39 AM. one Camel light, one Vicodin, and the Strauss Oboe concerto. I will now start writing my paper that is due tomorrow. Goodnight, gentlemen.

In reality, there is no paper...

2008-12-09T19:58:00.001-08:00

The glasses are still broken in two and fall apart seemingly at will, much to the Cap'n's intense pleasure. He has embarked on a sojourn to a so called "productivity party". Godspeed. Apparently, according to the crazy girl in my class, Bill Clinton was in fact the first black president. The piano music supplied by Sparky permeates the room, giving it a subdued air. Papers remain undone, the Spanish test unlooked at; all is right with the world. Productivity, just like God, has been killed. Thank you Nietzsche.

Damn right he is.

2008-12-08T16:48:00.000-08:00

hold on there, Sparky!

there are clothes to be washed

2008-12-05T23:24:00.001-08:00

eight people in one room on one floor quietly watching a movie are loud enough to disturb two people in the hallway at the opposite end of the floor, but eight people on another floor loudly discussing sports, politics and geography while drinking are not loud enough to wake one soul in either neighboring room. one man will sleep through such a drunken party, but another will be kept awake by the unintelligible, whispered conversation that follows when everyone else has left. the physics alone boggles the mind.

chex mix

2008-12-03T08:36:00.001-08:00

it is so breakfast.

also, a protip: chex mix is actually French, so you must pronounce it "shey mee."

u!

2008-12-01T19:09:00.000-08:00

...ok.

also

2008-12-01T18:58:00.000-08:00

this champ.

sauce

2008-12-01T18:18:00.000-08:00

there we go.

the CP express

2008-12-01T17:37:00.000-08:00

wait a few minutes.......

memetic

2008-11-24T12:20:00.001-08:00

10: print "circular meme is"
20: goto 10

you know you're a douchebag when...

2008-11-24T11:48:00.000-08:00

a). you are a hipster riding a scooter, probably to class, in the middle of the street. Or even just if you are carrying it on your shoulder whilst texting. Actually, especially in the latter case. You consciously chose to ride around on an arcane, impractical, totally "gnarly" artifact of nostalgia instead of a skateboard, your god-given legs, or even an impractical bicycle (see below), ergo you are a douchebag.

b). you are a squirrel. Contrary to their adorable outward appearance, squirrels will eat you at the first opportunity. Plus they are total pussies. Have you ever seen them run around a tree, taunting you? Yeah.

c). you ride an impractical bicycle. You look like a moran.

d). you are a blogger (visible in foreground).

e). you wear a kiffiyeh. This one doesn't even need explaining.

f). you are John Sexton.

9/11 was an outside job. accounting is an inside job.

2008-11-24T09:12:00.000-08:00

there was a hand in the mailbox this morning, so i shook it. the fellow on the other side appeared to be a delivery man, but sadly had nothing for us.

batman practiced his half-hour-shower power this morning. it would have been inconvenient if i had needed the shower, but i have no engagements until the afternoon. batman suggests they're not even worth showing up to. i'm inclined to agree.

his mother called and they spoke upon his 'secret relationship.' the lass' parents do not approve, apparently. batman's mother, too, took a bit of convincing. she thought it very dishonest of him.

this is, in fact, a direct quote.

another lesson on happiness.

2008-11-23T20:55:00.001-08:00

no, sparky! sparky!

2008-11-23T16:10:00.000-08:00

a lesson

2008-11-23T10:16:00.000-08:00

happy.

sad.

irony

2008-11-23T09:53:00.000-08:00

the New York Times ran a piece today in their Style section asking if irony was dead or not.

declaring the death of a concept never works; it's like declaring war on an idea.

and you know who declared this death of irony? Joan Didion, the wrinkled queen of being wrinkly and old, and hence out of touch.

she clearly has never heard of:
a). hipsters
b). all conversations about hipsters
c). the internet

"you're like a big, round wizard."

2008-11-22T20:49:00.000-08:00

wolves!

this picture is in my psychology textbook.

yeeeeezy.

2008-11-22T19:25:00.000-08:00

Don't act like he didn't.

brog dog

2008-11-22T19:19:00.000-08:00

dog on brog/nam nam nam

fuguesfds

2008-11-22T18:50:00.000-08:00

glue

2008-11-22T18:46:00.000-08:00

<--- glue makes u illiterate!

2008-11-22T18:40:00.000-08:00

The Pecan Sandies ... it has a sexual meaning.

2008-11-22T18:18:00.001-08:00

Nicholas Roerich is probly gonna eat your face. This painting is called "Wait." Those are them Himalayas.

Other things: "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" has interrupted the Decemberists, but has failed to keep the Cap'n from practicin' his ax. And that is my story for you. The end.

Vote Early, Vote Often; Phase II.

2008-11-22T18:12:00.000-08:00

stupid stupid STUPID

Vote Early, Vote Often

2008-11-22T18:08:00.000-08:00

and you really fuckin' should, because I didn't. Because the Board of Elections never sent me my absentee ballot. So I couldn't help elect the 'bama.

What? That was like forever-y ago, shut up.